You can be proud of what you’ve built and still feel quietly disconnected from it.

Both things can be true at once.

I was recently speaking with someone who had read one of my posts about gratitude and misalignment coexisting. They said, “I keep coming back to that phrase.”

Nearly a decade in their role.

Strong team.

Valued work.

Good compensation.

Genuinely grateful.

And yet, Sunday nights are starting to feel heavy.

Their question was simple and honest:

“How do I know when restlessness is information worth listening to, versus just the cost of ambition?”

Here’s what I’d say.

If you’re aware that something feels off, that awareness itself matters. We get very good at suppressing these signals.

The fact that you’re paying attention is not small.

That’s the first step.

I think restlessness is worth listening to when it reflects something core being eroded over time. Autonomy. Connection. Meaning.

It doesn’t feel temporary. You can imagine getting better at what you’re doing, and the weight doesn’t lift. It deepens.

That’s the distinction.

In nearly every conversation I’ve had with professionals navigating this, the truth becomes more clear when they sit with one simple question:

“When I imagine myself becoming more skilled, more supported, with better resources on my current path, does this feeling ease, or does it intensify?”

If it eases, you’re likely feeling the cost of growth/ambition.

Discomfort is part of stretching.

If the thought of getting better at what you’re doing makes the restlessness heavier, that’s your system telling you something fundamental has shifted.

There’s real information in that answer.

Not urgency.

Not a mandate to change everything.

Just clarity about what’s actually true for you.

And as this year closes and a new one begins, maybe the most honest thing we can do is listen to what’s already trying to tell us something.

Here’s to a year of listening more carefully.

Happy New Year!